Tuesday, August 15, 2006

Baptising Cats

We have a cat that is looking for membership at
our church, she was baptised last week, but now
we have a theological problem...should a cat be
baptised once only, or nine times for each life?

We are an orthodox fellowship and do not baptise
kittens!

11 comments:

Brian Robertson said...

Would this be a real anabaptist!

Simon Varwell said...

I'm assuming you used the shorter cat-echism?

rsbriggs said...

The answer, from a practical point of view, would be to baptise the cat each time it "uses" a new life. I think this would be theologically consistent (my second baptism, were I to do so, would probably just be a bath), but also would be a great encouragement to other cats seeking to gain theological enlightenment.

Dave said...

Some nice serious comments, and sorry Simon, we went for the Nicene Creed, she especially liked the term 'Holy Cat-holic Church.

RSBriggs, your theological input was needed and helped clarify the situation. Now if she loses a life we need just raise her from the dead and baptise the new life, mind you I guess we could just do a 'baptism for the dead', it worked a few hundred years ago.

Any cats reading this and looking for further theological enlightenment should contact their local Cat - hedral

dinsy said...

Problem with baptising each time cat uses a new life is - we only know when they have used up all nine, and then they are dead and it is too late. So though it is the best idea, I don't see how it can be put into practice. Any ideas?

Dave said...

No Probs Dinsy, even if the cat reaches life 9 and dies, it is assured of eternity (does God allow animals in heaven?), so should not prove a problem. More problematic is trying to hold a cat under water for a few seconds, also this then raises the issue of communion, is the table open to cats, should we still use wine or switch to milk, and if so what kind, skimmed, semi skimmed, lactose free?

See how difficult it is being an inclusive community!!!

Simon Varwell said...

I am sure that cats showing an interest in Christianity would be alarmed if this debate got taken over by too much dogma...

Meg said...

If another cat, having also been baptized, wanted to join the congregation and the first cat objected (not surprisingly), then what how would the inevitable "hissy fits" be blocked from the sermon tapes?

Dave said...

They would each have to bow under the denominational rules (does Catholic sound like a feline drink problem?).

Ultimately, if both had signed the membership rules then I see no problem, obviously some would say that the new cat needs to be rebaptised into the 'denomination' as their previous baptism was not valid (especially if baptised as a kitten), sadly Calvin and Luther appear silent on the subject.

Shieldsy said...

I think most cats would be non-conformist. They wouldn't be seen dead in any place run by someone in a dog-collar.

Meg said...

Or collars turned backwards... (The dog-collars may only be for off-hours, Shieldsy... :>)...)

I think that most cats would have a problem "getting with the program" in most things Catholic. For one thing, there's the holy water. (Yikes. That might be the deal-breaker right there.) Then there are the rosaries: great cat toys, but what else are they good for? Then there would be the confessional. Do cats ever come under conviction that they've done anything they need to confess?! To a human, of all things?!?

 

Free Blog Counter