Friday, June 23, 2006

Before the World Cup final group games

A Sunday league football team is so desperate for players that one Sunday they are forced to play with a chicken in their team. Surprisingly, the chicken has a brilliant first half. One minute it's clearing off its own line, the next putting in a perfect cross. At half time all the teammates
are very pleased and everyone runs back onto the pitch for the second half.
On the way the ref starts chatting to the chicken.
"Great first half mate." says the ref.
"Thanks," replies the chicken, "I try to keep myself fit. It's difficult finding time, but I do an hour in the gym each morning before work."
"What do you do?" asks the ref.
"I'm a chartered accountant," comes the reply.
At which point the referee brandishes the red card and sends the chicken
off. The bemused teammates gather round and start complaining to the referee.
"Sorry lads," says the referee, "I had no choice. Professional fowl."

World Cup
2010 - it is just before Scotland v Brazil in a World Cup Group game. Ronaldinho goes into the Brazilian changing room to find all his teammates looking a bit glum.

"What's up?" he asks.
"Well, we're having trouble getting motivated for this game. We know it's important but it's only Scotland. They're no challenge and we can't be bothered".

Ronaldinho looks at them and says "Well, I reckon I can beat these by myself, you lads go down the pub."

So Ronaldinho goes out to play Scotland by himself and the rest of the Brazilian team go off for a few jars.

After a few pints they wonder how the game is going, so they get the landlord to put the teletext on. A big cheer goes up as the screen reads "Brazil 1 - Scotland 0 (Ronaldinho 10minutes)". He is beating Scotland all by himself!

Anyway, a few more pints later and the game is forgotten until someone remembers "It must be full time now, let's see how he got on". They put the teletext on.

"Result from the Stadium "Brazil 1 (Ronaldinho 10 minutes) - Scotland 1 (Fletcher 89 minutes)".

They can't believe it, he has single handedly got a draw against Scotland!! They rush back to the Stadium to congratulate him. They find him in the dressing room, still in his gear, sat with his head in his hands.

He refuses to look at them. "I've let you down, I've let you down."

"Don't be daft, you got a draw against Scotland, all by yourself. And they only scored at the very, very end!"

"No, No, I have, I've let you down... I got sent off after 12 minutes"

1 comment:

dinsy said...

Right Pal, you're extradited!

(really funny though)


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